Gold or Dust.

“How can I help? I’m not sure I’ve got much to offer.”

I’ve talked this question through so many times with folk wanting to volunteer or help in some way on different projects I’ve been leading. 

Regardless of the project, the answer I give is similar: 

“Bring your ears and listen. Remember people’s names and what folk like in their tea. Keep turning up and showing that you’re bothered. Share something of yourself and what you’re good at and look for the magic in the person across from you too.” 

This is the pure, precious gold of one human helping another. 

One person gives out. Another person receives. 

The care and belief is real. The relationship grows. 

The ‘helper’ gains so much more than they expected - learning from the experience and the person they are helping. 

The person ‘being helped’ builds their capacity and is less alone, feeling the compassion that is offered. 

When we get it right, there’s respect on both sides and the gold flows in both directions.

Organisations are people

When we move beyond individuals and think about whole organisations wanting to make a difference, we lose sight of what’s golden at our peril.

Organisations are collections of people working towards a common goal. An interconnected web of humans - never actually boxes on a chart.

A team of people working together to help others can achieve incredible things when it builds strong connections with one another and operates with care.

How we treat one another in our shared work is not just important - it's everything.

Blink and the magic is gone

As organisations grow or when they’re under stress, there is the considerable risk of ethos slipping down the pecking order of priorities. 

When we’re too busy to take care, when we let the small things slide, when we stop listening to the people around us - we’re in big trouble.

Disrespect the importance of the tiny, everyday actions that build safe, consistent and caring environments and blink….the magic has gone. 

Beware the really icky feeling

There are a lot of grey decisions in the world where the right thing to do is very much a judgement call and things aren’t black and white.

But, there are also times when we know in the pit of our stomachs that we’re entering territory at odds with our values.

If we take a minute to slow down and connect with our disquiet, we can feel the moment when a single step further would be the tipping point between helping or harming.  

As a leader, if we decide to cross that line and operate in a space where values are disposable, we cause untold damage to the people connected with our work.

Protecting our golden environments

Instead, we must set the standard for how we expect people to treat one another. To work hard every day to model care and respect for others.

And, if we see instances where sufficient care is not being taken, it’s our role to challenge our colleagues and say stop or slow down.

No matter how inconvenient, the development and protection of the people involved in our work must be our first, second and third priority. 

The Four Cs 

So how do we create teams and organisations where people can thrive and make the biggest possible difference together?

A former team mate taught me this brilliant model for creating a golden environment:

• CARE

Show your genuine care for others. Treat everyone with the same respect you’d show your own family or friends. 

• CONSISTENCY

Keep turning up. If you say you are going to do something for somebody, do it. Equally, if you make a mistake or can’t help, be honest about it.

• CHALLENGE

Have clear boundaries that keep relationships and spaces safe. Expect the best from everyone but challenge destructive behaviour when you see it.

• CLOSURE

If you’ve challenged someone’s behaviour and left them in an uncomfortable place, bring the discussion to a conclusion and put the relationship back on an even keel.

Putting it all together

The thing I really love about the ‘Four C’s’ is the ability to combine the different ‘C’s to make the most difference.

It is the drip, drip, drip of consistent care that makes such a difference to a person’s life.

And the daily layering of a team’s effort to offer both care and challenge that can make an organisation great and its impact exponential. 

If we place the highest value on human connection, we can create golden environments together.

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

Leo Buscaglia